Day Twenty: Anchored In No
My beliefs will run through everything I do. My beliefs, my values are my anchor and when people try to drag me, as I know they will, it is to that sense of right and wrong, that sense of who I am and what I believe, to which I will always hold. —Ed Miliband
Most of us have people in our lives outsiders might consider enablers or just downright selfish. We have at times allowed certain people to overstep our boundaries because we don’t/didn’t know any better, because we don’t want to make them mad, because we don’t want to see them struggle. Excuses, excuses.
In order to put your best version of yourself out there, you can’t have things or people weighing you down, or holding you back.
Today your focus is on a relationship with another person. You won’t be buddying up as we have on previous Saturdays. You’ll but uncoupling or setting up strict boundaries.
You’ll be saying “no.”
Try to identify what’s slowing you down. What is keeping you from reaching your goals or living up to your potential? Is it the actions of another person? Is it someone borrowing money but never paying it back?
See if you can clearly identify who and what that is. Our bet is that as soon as you read the questions, you already knew. First thought best thought. Trust your gut. It may be quite uncomfortable to acknowledge to yourself that somebody you’ve let into your life is dragging you down. But remember, nobody can live your best life but you. And sometimes you’ll need to make some hard choices.
First you need to be clear about what the problem is and exactly what you need to do to move forward more efficiently. Then, you have to muster the strength and courage to take action. To say “no.” To set a clear boundary.
Whatever you decide, you must stay firm, stand your ground, plant your anchor and hold tight. It may be a bit bumpy for a while, but eventually you will find calm.